Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Being a Mom can be Hard

WARNING...I am about to talk about breast feeding. Continue on at your own risk...

Before I even got pregnant, I was committed to breast feeding a baby for at least a year. I knew there would be difficulties but I was going to do it no matter what. I know that breast milk is best for the baby and it is also much cheaper. I was committed.

Today, I am questioning that commitment. I know this is just one of the difficulties that I will have to endure, but it's really hard this week. Let me start by saying that I have never had a huge supply of milk. I hear stories of people leaking. I am not one of those people. I have always had enough for Ainsley. Surplus is a dream, not a reality.

I have been back at work for 3 1/2 weeks now. I had arranged with my boss that while at work, I would pump twice. Everything was going fairly smooth until this week. Typically at work when I pump, I get at least 4 ounces. I also pump right before I go to bed. Usually another 4 ounces. That puts me even for the day.

Yesterday I struggled to get my 4 ounces at work, but I did it. I pumped before I went to bed and only got 2 ounces. I was down 2 ounces. My freezer only has about 3 days surplus so I can't afford to go down. I decided that I would get up at 1:45 to pump again. I did it. And then I was up again at 4:30 with Ainsley.

Today I struggled even more. My first pump I got 3 1/2 ounces. The second only 3. I called the Women's Hospital. They told me that I am doing everything right and to just keep feeding her alot and pumping alot. They said to try pumping after I feed her. I got home today and thought I would give this a shot. I had my bottles on the coffee table attached to the pump on the floor. My dog, Tucker, ran by and knocked one over. I only lost a tiny bit but my heart broke. I work so hard for each and every drop.

So here it is 7:30 and Ainsley is down for the night. I am down 5.5 ounces. I will pump at least 2 more times tonight. I can only pray that I will get enough to be even by the time I wake up and start it all over again tomorrow.

Do any moms out there have any suggestions or words of encouragement? I could sure use them.


  1. A few things...lots of fluids, I have heard there are herbal supplements that you can take to help increase your milk, and lastly, a friend of minehere has the same problem with no a lot of milk and she is now drinking a guiness ever night...something about the dark stout beer that is supposed to help? I don't know?

  2. Unfortunately I never ran into a lack of milk. I was the one that could have fed everyone's child and still had 6 ounces left over. I know it must be frustrating and pumping is a a pain, especially when you have a lot of other stuff to do. My suggestion is prayer and give your anxiety to the Lord because stress will also affect your supply. Don't be too hard on yourself if for some reason you won't be able to continue until she's a year old. You've already given her so much and she's doing great. And you're doing great. Sometimes our bodies have different plans than we do. Sorry that this isn't a great answer, but I hope it helps.

  3. I've been following your blog for a while and wanted to hopefully help with this issue. Because of cicumstances I ended up pumping full time when my oldest was two months old. I pumped every three hours and took Fenugreek (can't remember the exact spelling but it's an herb and I took NINE HORSE PILLS a day..but it helped at first). The every three hour pumping built up my milk supply and helped a lot. It's DEFINITLEY a committment, but it can work.
    Hope this helps!

  4. Hey! Something I did when breastfeeding was I made sure that I fed Aliha as soon as I got home every day. Then I did the thing where you try to pump right afterwards. When home, I tried to pump every hour just to keep myself constantly going. It's hard, but I definitely felt that it was so worth it in the end. Aliha was very healthy while feeding, and I'm a firm believer it helps them out that way. I only lasted ten months, but to me (who also had the year mark) I had succeeded. Just keep it up as long as you can, and put it in God's hands. It will work out the way it needs to.

  5. I used a tea called "Mother's Milk" - you can buy it at most natural stores and some grocery stores. That plus tons of water and protein really seemed to amp up my milk when I was running low.

    Something else that helped me mentally was knowing that even though I was going to breastfeed for 1 year, around 6 months you will introduce solids and sippy cups with water... so breastfeeding goes down to about 3 or 4 times a day. Much easier to juggle - you might even be able to stop pumping and be around for all her feedings.

    I'll say a prayer for you, because I know how frustrating it can be. Hang in there!


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